When Parenting Feels Impossible
The tantrums. The calls from school. The way “put your shoes on” turns into a forty-minute war. This is not what you signed up for.
If you’re here, some of this probably sounds familiar:
- Exhausted and lonely — nobody outside your house knows how bad it gets inside it.
- Confused — you’ve tried the books, the charts, the calm voice and the firm voice. Why doesn’t any of it work?
- Frightened — not about tonight, about ten years from now, and whether your child will be okay in the world.
- Done being blamed — if one more professional says that this is somehow your fault, you might scream.
You don’t need another list of tips written for somebody else’s child. You need real answers and clear guidance about the child you actually have.
From Chaos to Connection
I help stressed-out parents manage their child’s challenging behavior, so the whole family’s quality of life improves.
My approach is rooted in compassion, acceptance, and skill-building — not blame, and not a campaign to turn your child into someone else. Instead of endless battles, you’ll learn to:
- Use practical tools that reduce the daily chaos
- Build connection and strengthen your relationship with your child
- Support your child’s growth in realistic, sustainable ways
Together, we’ll help you feel more confident, calm, and steady as a parent.
Questions Parents Ask Me
Be honest — is this my fault?
No. Our children come to us with their own built-in temperament, sensitivities, strengths and challenges. Often, when parents are really struggling, the child has underlying needs or challenges that give rise to their difficult behavior. It’s not your child’s fault either—they are doing the best they can with the limited skills they have to show you what isn’t working for them. Most standard parenting advice is given for neurotypical kids. When it fails at your house, that is information about the fit of the strategy, not a verdict on your parenting.
How can working with me change my child’s behavior?
How you approach situations with your child has an enormous impact on their outcome. You spend so much time with your child, that adjusting what you’re doing has the potential to make a substantial difference in how they respond. Sometimes the first step is not changing your child’s behavior but changing how you think and feel about parenting. That can go a long way toward making you feel better about your interactions with your child.
We’ve tried everything. Why would this be different?
Almost every parent I meet has tried a great deal. Usually, the issue isn’t that you did it wrong — it’s that the strategy was aimed at the wrong target. We start by working out what is actually driving the behavior, then build from there and adjust when something doesn’t fit your family.
My partner and I handle this completely differently. Is that a problem?
It’s extremely common, and it’s workable. Two parents responding differently usually reflects two people coping with something difficult in their own ways, not a character flaw in either. We work toward enough consistency on the things that matter most — not identical parenting, which no household has ever achieved.
A New Kind of Parenting Support
Parenting is hard — but it doesn’t have to feel this hard. And you don’t have to figure it out alone.
Call or email me to set up your free consultation. Let’s work together to create real, lasting change for your whole family.
Sagewood Counseling
Individual and Relationship Therapy for Adults
Inver Grove Heights, Mendota Heights, Eagan, Woodbury, St. Paul, West St Paul, South St. Paul, Minneapolis, Richfield, Cottage Grove, and other Twin Cities communities.
Contact
612.325.7899
5798 Blackshire Path
Inver Grove Heights, MN 55076
lisa@sagewoodcounseling.com